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03 Aug

Communication Tactics: “Surrender” contributes to a fair and flexible office environment

Would you like the people with whom you work to be more fair and flexible?

Remember this communication truth: It is only what you are not giving that can possibly be missing from this relationship.
That said, if you want people to be more flexible with you, be more flexible with them. In other words; surrender more.

Communication tactic: "Surrender" leads to fair and flexible work environment
Communication tactic: “Surrender” leads to a fair and flexible work environment–and reciprocity!

Most smart, savvy communicators are accustomed to getting their way and “winning.” A dangerous side-effect of savvy communication can sometimes be that people become a little too aggressive and determined to “win.”
If you’re on a mission to get the people you work with to be more flexible and agree with you more, and perhaps concede points now and then, try this effective professional communication skills tactic from expert communication trainer and motivational keynote speaker Dan O’Connor: The Surrender Tactic.

The surrender tactic
goes like this:

When you find yourself in a discussion or even an argument with colleagues (especially difficult people), instead of proving your point or trying to convince people to go along with your idea, if the issue or point of disagreement is something that you can concede to, simply use the three step process:
1) State your objection (Power Phrase: “It’s difficult for me to see how that will work,”)
2) Convey Trust (Power Phrase: “I trust your judgement,”)
3) Show support (Power Phrase: “You have my support.”)
To put it all together, it would sound something like this: “Mark, while it’s difficult for me to see how the change in the accounting process will work, I trust your judgement and you have my support. You can count on me to help any way I can.”
Sounds simple, doesn’t it? It actually is quite simple, but it’s not easy because our ego tends to get in the way and we choose to be right rather than effective.
Remember that the more people see you as fair and flexible, the more people will choose to be fair and flexible with you. Give it=Get it.

To join Dan’s training group: click here

Do you want to learn more about communication training that can help you become a more powerful, assertive, direct communicator? Communication that can change your life?  Go to Dan ‘s store and check out his audios and videos, along with his 50-lesson comprehensive communication training course.

Does your office need a communication trainer–a world-renowned expert trainer in customer service– who can help you create a healthy, safe office environment? Would you like training in handling negativity; teams and leadership; and creating a respectful, professional work-place? Then go to and request a quote from Dan and his team. 


Dan O’Connor specializes in delivering strategic verbal patterns, danger phrases, power phrases, lead-in lines, closing lines, freestyle scripts, and other specific tactics that participants can immediately use to achieve instant results both at work and at home.

Thousands of individuals listen each day to Dan’s online podcasts and watch his videos, and the nations leading businesses have had Dan come onsite to help with creating healthier relationships, a more positive work environment, a superior customer service force, and an atmosphere that promotes and values all of the people ­­all of the time.

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